How Not To Negotiate
Today, Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert promised the following at the conclusion of the regional summit in Sharm el-Sheikh
For our part, we received a committment from Abbas to bring about the release of Gilad Shalit from Hamas (which he cannot possibly do, since he heads Fatah, the group with which Hamas is engaged in battle), and some very nice photo ops.
I can just imagine the negotiation.
Olmert: I see you need help, so here’s what I’m willing to do. I’ll release 100 Fatah prisoners without blood on their hands.
Abbas: 150.
Olmert: 250.
Abbas: Deal.
Olmert: But they cannot return to terror.
Abbas: You can get them to sign a note. They are men of their word who would never lie.
Saeb Erekat: Massacre!
Olmert: Ok. And I’ll throw in improved freedom of movement, frozen tax funds, and a bonus set of steak knives. Just don’t give them to the prisoners we release.
Abbas: Ok.
Olmert: Shucks, I see you are still a little sad. So I guess we could also supply Gaza with electricity, water, health servicesand food. After all, one cannot punish the people because they are being ruled by the terrorists of Hamas. It is not like they voted for them or anything.
Abbas: *cough*
Olmert: Ok, and I’ll clearly state that we recognize your government and we’ll work to bring about a palestinian state. Damn, you drive a hard bargain.
Abbas: Sucker
Olmert: Sucker. He doesn’t know I also would have thrown in my Get Out of Jail Free card.
An Australian immigrant to Israel, Aussie Dave has been blogging since early 2003.
June 25th, 2007 at 5:56 pm
Your post is pretty much spot on, except that the photo should clarify that of the two individuals depicted, one is an idiotic clown, and the other is merely dressed as one.
June 25th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
There are many things that Abbas can be asked to do, that he can.
He can stop the incitement against Jews on Palestinian radio and television.
He can speak against the boycotts in England.
He can make a strong edict against Fatah members carrying out attacks against Israel.
He can publically thank Israel for not turning off the electric to Gaza.
He can publically state that Israel has the right to exist.
These are little things.
They are not much to ask for. Instead, the Israeli government gives and gives and gives and asks for and receives absolutely nothing in return.
Stan
June 25th, 2007 at 9:44 pm
Aarggh! Does anyone know when Israeli elections begin? (for Prime Minister that is)
June 25th, 2007 at 11:36 pm
Every time I hear about moderate Palestinian leaders, I tell people they are in my living room playing poker with the Easter Bunny and my pet unicorn.
Anyway, I would consider it an honor and a privilege if you would add my blog “The Tygrrrr Express” http://www.blacktygrrrr.wordpress.com to your list of linked sites if you feel the quality is high.
I came across your blog through 762 Justice and the Rottweiler’s websites, since I enjoy their attitude.
Happy summer.
eric
March 12th, 2008 at 11:04 am
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