I couldn’t resist this story.
A dwarf performer at the Edinburgh fringe festival had to be rushed to hospital after his penis got stuck to a vacuum cleaner during an act that went horribly awry.
Daniel Blackner, or Captain Dan the Demon Dwarf, was due to perform at the Circus of Horrors at the festival known for its oddball, offbeat performances.
The main part of his act was for him to appear on stage with a vacuum cleaner attached to his member with a special apparatus.
The attachment broke before the performance and Mr Blackner tried to fix it using extra-strong glue, but unfortunately only let it dry for 20 seconds instead of the 20 minutes required.
He then joined it directly to his organ. The end result? A solid attachment, laughter, mortification and … hospitalisation.
“It was the most embarrassing moment of my life when I got wheeled into a packed A&E with a vacuum attached to me,” Mr Blackner said.
“I just wished the ground could swallow me up. Luckily, they saw me quickly so the embarrassment was short-lived.”
Appropriate choice of words.
