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Tennis Terrorism

Damir Dokic, father of Serbian-turned-Australian-turned-Serbian-turned-Australian tennis player Jelena Dokic, has been taking notes from Iranian President Mahmoud “Gorilla Boy” Ahmadinejad.

Damir Dokic says he is seeking to kidnap his estranged daughter Jelena, and has threatened to kill an Australian as revenge for her returning to the country.

 

In a sensational rant to a Serbian newspaper, Damir Dokic has vowed revenge against Australia for conspiring to return the 2000 Wimbledon semi-finallist to the country.

 

Damir, renowned for his erratic behaviour, says he wants to drop a nuclear bomb on Australia and accuses Croatia and the Vatican of influencing her decision to quit Serbia and return to Australia.

 

Under her father’s guidance, Jelena Dokic quit Australia for Serbia in 2001, and has only just returned to the Australian fold after becoming estranged from Damir.

 

“Australia with the help of Croatia and the Vatican have brainwashed my daughter,” Damir told Serbian daily Kurir.

 

“I have thought about dropping a nuclear bomb on Sydney since Jelena lost in the first round this week, for which Australia is to blame.

 

“I have even thought about killing an Australian in revenge, but I wouldn’t gain anything from it.”

 

Damir has sought help from Serbian politicians, including an accused war criminal, in kidnapping Jelena.

 

“Only two were ready to help,” Damir said.

 

“One of them however, Vojislav Seselj, is waiting to be tried at the International War Crimes Tribunal in the Hague.”

 

Damir said it was Australia, rather than him, that was mentally suspect.

 

“Australia is a spoiled nation,” Damir said.

 

“They can expect my revenge.

Needless to say, Damir claims he is completely normal, especially when compared to those crazy, barbaric Aussies.

“I’m not crazy when I say this, they are the crazy ones who give you hot sausages before the match when it’s 40 degrees celsius outside.”

Oh, the inhumanity!

About the author

Picture of David Lange

David Lange

A law school graduate, David Lange transitioned from work in the oil and hi-tech industries into fulltime Israel advocacy. He is a respected commentator and Middle East analyst who has often been cited by the mainstream media
Picture of David Lange

David Lange

A law school graduate, David Lange transitioned from work in the oil and hi-tech industries into fulltime Israel advocacy. He is a respected commentator and Middle East analyst who has often been cited by the mainstream media
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