From Mahmoud to Dubya


Iranian President Mahmoud “Gorilla Boy” Ahmadinejad has written a letter to U.S President Bush, the first time an Iranian president has written to his US counterpart since the 1979 Iranian Revolution.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has written to President George W. Bush proposing “new solutions” to their differences in the first letter from an Iranian leader to an American president in 27 years, government spokesman Gholam-Hossein Elham said Monday.

The letter was sent via the Swiss Embassy in Tehran, which has a US interests section, Elham told a press conference.

In the letter, Ahmadinejad proposes “new solutions for getting out of international problems and current fragile situation of the world,” Elham said.

Elham did not mention the nuclear dispute, the major issue on which Washington and Tehran are at loggerheads. The United States is leading Western efforts to pass a UN Security Council motion censuring Iran for refusing to cease enrichment of uranium.

In an Israellycool exclusive, I have gotten hold of the letter (through my contacts with the Zionist Conspiracy). Here is the letter in its entirety:

To Mr Bush,

First, excuse my poor way of executing a letter in good English. I like to execute properly, but I find it very hard to do so. Lucky, I have found a good translator who will help me in making better English in this letter. Otherwise, I will execute him. Just joking. (I am a piece-loving man).

I contact you in the hope of defusion the situation. You and I – we are not so much different. Sure, I have more wives than you, but other than that, we are so much alike.

I am saddened by the cold relatives between our nations, and would like to heat them up considerably. We need new solutions for getting out of international problems and current fragile situation of the world. I would very much like to arrive at a final solution.

Let us meet for coffee next time I am in New York for the United Nations.

Kind Rearguards,
President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

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A lawyer by education, David Lange - founder and managing editor of Israellycool - found his calling in advocating for Israel and the Jewish people. He is available for public speaking engagements.