Hamashole Ismail’s Unwell

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Ismail HaniyehSenior Hamashole Ismail Haniyeh has reportedly been rushed to hospital shortly after emerging from hiding during Operation Protective Edge. The exact cause is not known.

Here are the latest odds for what happened:

16-1: Scalp condition caused by contaminated shampoo



12-1: Bad hangover (the guys got carried away at their “victory” celebration toga party)

8-1: Old soccer injury flaring up

5-1: Food poisoning caused by a bad batch of Zionist Dairy Products of Death.TM

2-1: Terrible rash caused from soiling his panties

Whatever the cause, I’m sure Haniyeh’s happy he’s getting the best possible care.

Well, second best possible care.

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A lawyer by education, David Lange - founder and managing editor of Israellycool - found his calling in advocating for Israel and the Jewish people. He is available for public speaking engagements.