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Saddam on the Offensive (Smell)

For someone who may be facing execution for crimes against humanity, Saddam Hussein has gone right on the offensive during his trial.

Saddam Hussein has told the judges hearing his trial to “go to hell” during a furious outburst in court in which he complained of having no clean underwear.

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Saddam told the judges to “go to hell” and claimed he and his co-defendants had “no chance to take a shower and no chance to smoke a cigarette”.

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Saddam denounced his trial for crimes against humanity as an US-inspired farce pandering to electoral agendas. He then pleaded exhaustion and said he lacked clean clothes.

 

The Associated Press reported he told the court: “Are you deliberately hauling defendants before the trial when they are exhausted? … This is your business, but I want to clarify to you that … we have spent these days in this shirt.

Saddam has even come up with his own definition of terrorism.

“There is no underwear, no chance to take a shower and no chance to smoke a cigarette if some do smoke, no chance for one to walk a couple of steps outside the small room. This is terrorism.”

I prefer to think of those depriving him of these things as “militants” or “resistance fighters.”

 

Oh, the brutality of it all!

 

“You know what? You can just go to hell!”

“There is no underwear, no chance to take a shower and no chance to smoke a cigarette if some do smoke, no chance for one to walk a couple of steps outside the small room. For goodness sake, look at me! I am so badly in need of a smoke, my hand is shaking uncontrollably. This is terrorism!”

“Just give me a second to confirm it..yes, my Quran says that this is definitely terrorism.”

“Ok, maybe I got a bit carried away. But please! I’m begging you..please at least let me change my underwear!”

Judge1: “What do you think?”

Judge2: “Considering I can smell him from here, let’s do it – for the sake of everyone else in this courtroom!”

Judge1: “Ok then, Hussein. Go change outside.”

The next day..

 

About the author

Picture of David Lange

David Lange

A law school graduate, David Lange transitioned from work in the oil and hi-tech industries into fulltime Israel advocacy. He is a respected commentator and Middle East analyst who has often been cited by the mainstream media
Picture of David Lange

David Lange

A law school graduate, David Lange transitioned from work in the oil and hi-tech industries into fulltime Israel advocacy. He is a respected commentator and Middle East analyst who has often been cited by the mainstream media
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