Palestinian Takes A Stab At Missing Class

Old and busted: “The dog ate my homework.”

New hotness: “I had a Jew to stab.”

An 18-year-old east Jerusalem resident has been identified as the assailant who stabbed Israeli soldier Yehudit Aharon in Jerusalem’s Light Rail earlier this month. His remand was extended until all legal proceedings against him are completed.

Aharon, 19, was stabbed in the chest and hand while the train pulled into the Pisgat Zeev station. The suspect, who was inside the train, waited for it to stop and then stabbed the victim causing her moderate injuries.

According to the police investigation, the suspect headed towards his school armed with a knife on the day of the attack. He decided to skip classes and at 10:09 am boarded the Light Rail back to his home.

On the train, he recognized the soldier and sat opposite her. Seconds before the train pulled into the station he stabbed Aharon several times and fled the scene. He returned home where he met his brother and recounted the attack.

He later boarded a bus heading to the Qalandiya checkpoint in the hopes of finding shelter with his family in Ramallah. He dropped his knife during the ride and was later arrested at the checkpoint.

But not to worry, Ahmud Knifeyhands. You’ll likely receive an even better education now.

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