Obama Wins 2nd Nobel Prize for Creating the Israeli-Saudi Alliance
Oslo: The International Community is positively giddy with the news that Former President Barack Obama is to receive his SECOND Nobel Peace Prize! Nobel Committee spokesperson Lars Olaf addressed the assembled news media earlier today.
“The Nobel Committee is proud to award this year’s prize to Barack Obama for his steadfast work uniting former enemies in the belief that his policies posed a clear and present danger to their respective nations. Mr. Obama’s Iran Policy has managed to bring Israel into a de-facto alliance with Saudi Arabia, Egypt, and the United Arab Emirates. Ten years ago, this would be unthinkable!”
The electrified crowd burst into applause when Mr. Obama strode into the room to accept his prize. “Please excuse my lateness, I was leading from behind…Then again, we are the one we’ve been waiting for.” The Former President continued. “But as much as I am happy to accept this award, the safety of Israel and Saudi Arabia were never affected by my policies. As I told Bibi, it’s just like ObamaCare…..If you like your regional security, you can keep it…….Now is this the part of the ceremony where I bow?”
In addition, many Obama Administration alumnae were on-hand to share in the joy of the occasion, and spoke with the Daily Freier about just what this moment meant for them. Ben Rhodes explained. “I am so proud to be in this honored chamber on this auspicious day. And what amazing acoustics! You can really hear the echo in this chamber!”
Samantha Power was equally joyful. “I am just so grateful to the Nobel Committee for having the courage to cast this vote. I mean, I might have just abstained.”
“I must admit this award caught me by surprise.” explained a bewildered former Secretary of State John Kerry. “To be truthful, I was for this before I was against it.“
(Editor’s Note: So you think this story is ridiculous? Oh Please. This wouldn’t even be his silliest Peace Prize.)